Letter to Myself (Ghost of Student Teaching's Past)

Dear Self,

Wow, I bet you wouldn’t imagine the amazing things you went through during your time student teaching at East High School. You stayed with the same CT three semesters in a row she is extremely helpful by the way, so listen to all of the wisdom she gives you. Stick with your student teacher friends that are down the hall from you, especially Chris. He is big and strong and will protect you. Natalie will be a great friend to listen to your concerns, so always feel open to them. Oh, by the way, try taking Nature of Poetry a little earlier in your student career – that surely crunched your pre-student teaching semester! Make sure you start student teaching earlier than the required come-back date. Snow days may be lurking in your future. START YOUR KPTP ASAP! Don’t say “I’ll do it later” because later comes too late! Amber, be cautioned, early in the semester you’re going to have to deal with some serious grief. Your beloved grandma passes away, and you will feel the heavy burden of mourning on top of your teaching load. It’s okay to cry, it’s okay to say I need a moment, you’re grieving, you loved her so much, and she loved you, too. Remember? The last thing she said to you was how proud she was of you – and that she would be praying that you would get the job in Hutchinson (prayers are powerful!). You know she’s in a better place; you know she wants you to keep continuing, so do it. Don’t make excuses for yourself. Also, don’t worry about taking chances or making mistakes – you’ll make plenty of those. You may be called some interesting names by students, and may walk into a scandalous scene in the bathroom – but remember that all these experiences are helping you grow, and become the teacher YOU want to be. Oh, and yes, you get a job – in March! You receive two offers, but you know that your heart lingers to home. (You will watch Jane Eyre a million times and start empathizing with her pains of wandering and finding “home.”) You struggle with the transition of moving to Wichita – you absolutely despise it. Friday evenings can’t come fast enough for you to go back home. Some people won’t understand your longing and homesickness, but that’s okay. Remember the song "Rise" by Shawn McDonald -- it will get you by. 

Oh, back to those jobs. Don’t get so nervous and tongue-tied; you’ve waited for the opportunity to interview your entire college years. And those prayers, those heart-felt prayers you, your family and friends sent for that job? They worked. You received the job, not just any job, but the job in Hutchinson - home, home finally, and everything turned out so incredibly well, that only God Himself could do such wonders. Remember, your mother isn't the only support system you have, your fiance' loves and cares for you, don't neglect his needs, or his love. Note to self: kindness works wonders. You will struggle with the way some of the students treat you, but they don’t know you. Some of them will seem a bit stand-offish at first, but you have the support from your CT that you need. You will pass your KPTP; you will struggle with passing the Praxis English Content test. Just because you struggle, doesn’t mean you are incapable. You’ve worked hard, you know your content! Don’t let some silly test get you down. Tests don’t define who you are and how you work as a teacher. You will be frustrated, upset, you’ll cry (but try not to in front of the students), your patience will be tested; however, you will inspire, laugh, learn, teach, you will touch the lives of your students, and at the end of the day that is what truly matters. Best of luck as you go through this process! Stay positive and pray A LOT – you will need the strength that only God can give you.

 Sincerely,
Older, wiser, and more experienced You.

Surviving the Storm

Now that I know I have passed my KPTP, my heavy storm is only a light drizzle. I still have the concern of passing my last content test; however, I feel a great load has been lifted off of my shoulders. I have completed all of my full-time teaching duties, and I can't express how wonderful I feel about everything. I was talking to one of the other teacher's at our school about how fast the student teaching semester goes by. It seems like we only began student teaching just yesterday, and in three short weeks this experience will be over. It's amazing to reflect on all of the different experiences, the lessons learned, the moments of frustration, angst and the desire to give up. I have grown, I have learned to adapt and overcome, to accept that not all things will work out the way I want them to. I cannot believe that this is coming to the end. The picture up above is how I would put the end of this experience into a visual - I've survived the storm, now I'm coasting my way on to better and brighter days. My four years of college are finally coming to an end, and there's a rainbow at the end of my academic storm. I don't mean that I have completely disliked my academic journey, but there have been many things I have experienced through this journey. The best thing about journeys is the fact that we don't have to go through them alone.

This conversation from Frodo and Sam in the Lord of the Rings has to be similar to the conversations that I have had with my friends this year -- I was definitely a Frodo at some times! You can listen to the speech on the right.
Frodo: I can't do this, Sam.
Sam: I know. It's all wrong. By rights we shouldn't even be here. But we are. It's like in the great stories, Mr. Frodo. The ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger, they were. And sometimes you didn't want to know the end. Because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad happened? But in the end, it's only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines it will shine out the clearer. Those were the stories that stayed with you. That meant something, even if you were too small to understand why. But I think, Mr. Frodo, I do understand. I know now. Folk in those stories had lots of chances of turning back, only they didn't. They kept going. Because they were holding on to something.
Frodo: What are we holding onto, Sam?
Sam: That there's some good in this world, Mr. Frodo...and it's worth fighting for.

Thank you all for your encouragement through this entire process, I can't wait to celebrate all of our successes at our graduation ceremony. It's been a wild ride, but I'm so glad I was able to go through the experience of growing and becoming a teacher with the rest of you.

Live long and prosper, friends.
-Ms. A

Taming the Test

Over the past eight months I have been trying to prepare, study, and cram all of the information possible into my brain just to successfully pass the English Content Praxis test. Some may think I should be ashamed to speak so openly about my failures with passing this exam, but through failures come lessons, and through this lesson I have learned the ability to empathize and understand the frustrations my peers and students have with being required to test when our abilities are all different. Frustrations and adversities certainly get the best of us -- especially myself. I have struggled with passing my test, I have taken it a few times and have missed passing within the score margin of five to two points. Frustration, anger, fear, sadness, confusion ... I question, what is wrong with me? I've read the literature, I've even taught it! Then there's the books that I've never heard of, or the secondary character from Shakespeare's plays that I'm supposed to know the exact play they're from!? I don't teach or expect my students to learn on the basis of rote memory -- so why should teachers be required to do this? Constantly I have questioned myself, my ability, my thoughts. Am I really supposed to be doing this? I passed the PLT just fine; I had to take the ESL Praxis test twice (I finally broke down and took the summer test prep course, which was what I needed to succeed.) There's so much pressure looming over my head to pass this test. Now, I looked back at my testing records and have found that I passed my PLT and second ESL Praxis' when I took them in the summer time. Maybe there is some strange psychology behind this?

I think I can "tame the test" when I don't have the stress of school, or the KPTP, or any other influences. I plan on taking this English Praxis in June, and, I am confident that I will pass it this time. Getting away from the craziness of the school year, and life will give me time to clear my mind, and focus strictly on this test. I'm so thankful that I've been engaged for three years - our wedding is planned, and I feel no stress in that aspect of my life. I have faith that I can take this test and pass it. If you find yourself  struggling with studying or passing these tests just remember - we will be able to help our students when they feel the looming pressure of taking assessments. I hope that none of you have to struggle with the testing anxiety/frustrations that I have. Anxiety causes so many issues. The one thing that keeps me going is knowing that I haven't

gotten this far in my teaching career for a silly test to get in my way. I will overcome this! I know that it is pertinent to test teachers and their abilities, and I do not want my comments to sound like excuses, there are many factors that can affect an individual when under extreme amounts of pressure (I'm sure you all know what I mean).

 

If you need some additional resources I found an amazing website that not only has great information, but also resources that may help you pass the English Praxis.

http://praxis2.edublogs.org/the-study-guide/

 

Also, I know I posted this site on our class wiki, but procon.org has some interesting information about standardized testing for students - it's interesting to apply some of the ideas to the teachers' need for "standardized" Praxis tests: ProCon.org: Standardized Tests

 

 

Live long and prosper, friends.

Best of luck on your current or future testing endeavors and job hunts!
I'm sending good thoughts your way. :)

 

Ms. A

The Many Forms of Strength

We all know there are many forms of strength - physical strength to move our bodies with force and momentum, and then our mental strength that thrives on our emotions and deep thoughts. Lately, as the end is in sight I feel all forms, every single tiny bit of strength being withdrawn from my body. I have the relief and security of a job, my KPTP is done, I'm awaiting a Praxis test result, I've started packing for when my fiance' and I move, and I am slowly retiring my duties in the classroom. I should be completely relaxed, right?? I'm not quite sure why I have felt so exhausted. I found an interesting article on Burnout - the side effects and what causes it to happen. I love this profession, and I'm not tired of teaching. I just think the stress and pressure from all of the outside influences on top of my responsibilities of school have been building on one another, and I'm just suffering from the effects of my whirlwind of a life. I hope I'm not the only one out here feeling this way! Here's an article on Burnout that directly discusses the effects of burnout on an educator: Teacher Burnout (Just a quick thought - on the discussion board many claim that teacher burnout comes from the lack of organization, which I think to a point is true, but not the sole reason for teachers to suffer from burnout.)

My fiance' is also suffering from burnout with his engineering work, so we've both started keeping each other accountable for our eating habits and exercising habits and it has made a great difference, we've also been praying together before we go to bed every night. I just want this semester t

o end well, and I want to pass and complete all the necessary requirements so that I can teach with no worries in the fall! I have to smile at this thought: in my job interview I was asked how I would cope with burnout, and my personal response (which some may think inappropriate) was that I would pray for added strength and read my Bible and meditate on those things. The principal smiled at me and nodded his head. I know that not everyone would agree with that, but I wanted to be honest in my answer, and I think that when we interview we shouldn't hide who we really are. (I was still hired!) We all have different ways of coping, but we need some type of coping mechanism to get us through these difficult times. I think the weather also has a great impact on the students and teachers alike. It's April and cold, and it has snowed a little bit on and off... I'm so ready for some bright sunshine and warm air. I love the quote by Albert Camus. I have to remind myself that even though I'm exhausted, and tired, there is still a flame that shines brightly, even if my surroundings are dim.

I hope you all find the invincible summer within your souls to brighten your days and to get you through these next few weeks.

Live long and prosper, friends.
Ms. A

Found Happiness

"All who joy would win
Must share it -- Happiness was born a twin."
-- George Gordon Byron

I'm sure we can all admit that there is such a joy when spring break finally arrives. I have to admit, I didn't have fun activities planned; however, my break became really interesting as it progressed. I worked all week and finished grading research papers. On Friday, March 15 I had a second interview with a school, and on Monday, March 18 I had my first interview with my top pick school. I surprisingly heard back quickly from both interviews and was offered a job on Wednesday and Thursday. I have to admit that it actually felt nice to be "wanted" (haha!) by two different school districts; however, I knew in my heart that I wanted to come back home to teach. I have accepted my first teaching job at the Hutchinson Public School District, where I will be teaching 8th grade English/Language Arts, or 10th/11th grade High School English. What a relief I must say it is to finally have the security of a job. I'm so excited to hear about my classmates' experiences, and when they all get jobs, too! It's such a nerve-wracking, faith-building, anxiety-filled process to search for a teaching job, interview, receiving calls back. I feel much more motivated to push through these last six weeks of student teaching (YES! 6 weeks is all that is left!! crazy!) and editing and turning in my KPTP. I feel that a heavy burden has been lifted off of me, and I am anxious to progress.

During my interviews I was definitely asked some questions that are pertinent to teaching, but I had never thought about. I was asked if a student can really learn from a teacher they don't like. I was also asked if a teacher can teach a student they don't really like. I was also asked about what my "motto" or a statement that I have learned throughout my teaching experiences. I told them that every student is different, therefore they all learn differently. I was asked about differentiating instruction, and had to give real-life examples. I was also given specific scenarios. For instance, I was asked what hobbies or interests I have - I told them I love reading, and I've been busy wedding planning. They took wedding planning and said, say for instance you're teaching a lesson that involves wedding planning and the students are really enthusiastic and engaged with it. An administrator comes in and says they don't like the lesson plan because it isn't using the workbooks they spent $75,000 on, and want you to change it immediately, what do you? I told them that I would definitely take my lesson(s) and align it with Common Core standards and show the administrator that the students are following the core standards. They proceeded to suggest that the administrator still didn't like it, and wanted it changed, what would you do? I then said, well, I have to respect my administrators and bosses and what they say, and I would transition my lesson plans. They then proceeded to ask how I would tell my students about how we have to change lessons? I told them that I would plainly state that we enjoyed that lesson, but it is now time to transition and switch gears for a new lesson. I'm not sure if these were the specific answers they were looking for, but I tried to think critically and on my feet through the entire interview. One question they even asked was how often should a teacher think quickly about things? I said always. As teachers, we have to be on top of everything, situations/disciplinary issues need to be calmed or stopped immediately, there's no time to sit around and think about how to respond. We've been trained with the knowledge we need to make quick, honest, and right decisions.

Well anyway, that was a little insight into my interview! I am so excited about starting my job, and I'm excited and looking forward to hearing about the job opportunities of my classmates! :) Happiness should always be spread and shared!

Live long and prosper, friends!
-Ms. A

Writing about the Wild Things

I love the book, Where the Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak. I find it incredible how authors have such an imagination to create such amazing characters -- and beasts! I have had a new fascination with these creatures, and I believe this stems from the Urban Legends informative/argumentative papers that my Sophomore's are writing.

In class tonight there was a discussion on debate, and how to have students be respectful or accepting (not in the terms of liking) things they may not agree with. I feel like having my students write these Urban Legend papers has been a great part of developing their reasoning and arguing skills. During the research process, I have really tried to tell the students that it is important that their statements can be backed up with valid and reputable sources. I told them, just because your "momma" said so, doesn't mean anything to the individual you may be debating with. I want my students to be able to reason and debate issues using factual information. I remember something was mentioned in class tonight about teaching students these skills without using topics that were too personal to them. Urban Legends are so exotic in a sense - just like the creatures from Where the Wild Things Are. In the body of the students' papers they will be required to be strictly informative. They will also be required to use in-text citations, and quotations from their sources. This is completely new to them, so I must say it has been some-what of a challenge. As far as the topics go, the students are really intrigued by Urban Legends. I thought it would only be fair if they could write, argue, and discuss their personal thoughts in the conclusion of their papers. I love seeing my students go from being complete skeptics to actually questioning the existence of certain legends. One student who had Moth Man as a topic thought it was a total myth; however, after researching and obtaining some facts and eyewitness accounts, the student thought maybe it isn't quite a "Moth Man", but instead a really large bird, or something of that sort. I love going around and asking the students their thoughts on their papers and topics -- it's great to see the wheels turn in their minds as they begin to actually think about their legends.

On another note, I know that I have had some great struggles this semester, but at the end of it all I know that I just absolutely don't think I could ever do any other occupation. I feel like I was always destined to be a teacher -- this is what I feel was intended for me to do for all of my life. Inside of me there is an unconquerable hope for my future. I desire to help touch the lives of students, to help create them into amazing people. I want my students to feel that they matter and make a difference in the classroom setting.

Well, spring break is almost upon us, and we have a shortened week with students next week. I hope you all have a wonderful weekend! :o)

Live long and prosper, friends!
-Ms. A

The Wall of "Why"

I am so thankful to have another teacher in my family who has experienced some similar situations - the only difference is she teaches Kindergarten. She and I went out for a movie and dinner this past weekend, and she had mentioned to me how she wishes she could help her little ones find meaning with learning. Kindergarten is tough; for some of these children it's their first experience being immersed into a school environment. My cousin struggles with the lack of parental participation in her class. She worries for her students, because at their young age, it's vital for them to have an excitement for learning. I expressed to her my concern for my students now and in the future for finding meaning in their education. She gave me one of the most amazing ideas for a high school classroom. Her brother, who is a nurse, was required to create a poster for their "Wall of Why". His instructors told them that at points the [nursing] students will be completely fed up with the program, they will have really bad days, and they will make terrible mistakes; however, through this they need to remember the sole meaning as to why they are there. Therefore, they were required to create a poster with pictures, anything to be posted on their "Wall of Why" to remind them of what their purpose is, what their goals are, where they want to be at the end of the nursing program. Can someone say light bulb!

So, of course, I'm game for creating a "Wall of Why" for my students - the end is hard to see for high-schoolers, they need to be constantly reminded of their goals, their purpose in school and where they want to be after high school. I would be more than happy to sacrifice a wall of decorations, or even blank hallway space for a wall of purpose. I've even thought that a "Wall of Why" would be great for a teacher, maybe not a wall, but something to remind us of why we're teaching. A "Wall of Why" could be used for anything, healthier lifestyle, being a better person, teaching, or anything else.

Written purpose is much stronger, powerful and permanent than a thought of purpose that only lingers. The Mark Twain quote above would be great to add to the "Wall of Why", as well as the quote to the right.

I personally have struggles sometimes with making excuses and refusing to "find a way." I know that there are certain things that I am not good at doing, (i.e. test taking, staying committed to losing weight) but I know that in order to become a teacher I have to pass the Praxis test, in order to be healthy I have to work my body, and eat healthy foods. I have to find that purpose, and determination to be the best that I can be - why would I expect less of myself, or of my students? Hopefully you'll be inspired to create your own "Wall of Why", or "Paper of Purpose", this could be a great first day of school lesson plan - the best part is that their purpose is on the wall year-round, so when a reminder is needed, they can go to the "Wall of Why" and read why they are there.

"The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

as for those of us trying to find motivation to be healthier... 
"The best things in life make you sweaty."
- Edgar Allen Poe

(The authorship of this quote is questionable, but hey! I always need motivation to go exercise - haha!)



Find meaning in your life - dream until your dreams come true.
Live long and prosper, friends!
Ms. Aden

TGI .. Snow Day(s)!

I'm sure we all appreciate these extra days of being off for the crazy amount of snowfall! However, I look at my lesson plans and start to fret - how and when are we going to make up for the time lost? In the midst of my concerns though, I sit back, relax and enjoy the small break I have been given.

A friend shared this picture with me and I thought it was hilarious! Only in Kansas...
"Hey, Toto... Can you say Blizzard of Oz?!

Our in-service on Monday went really well, the department heads had discussed some interesting information with us about schedule changes, funds, reading lists, etc. While this large department meeting was going on, I had contemplated and thought about the interview I had on Monday. The principal had told me that if I were to get the job, I would be the only member of the English Department. As the day progressed I thought about the advantages and disadvantages of being a single unit department; the freedoms I would be allowed, but, then again the extra responsibility. In a high school of seventy students though, this may not be such a bad thing. I think of the rapport I could build with the students and their families. Also, the community is small, which is appealing to me.

Anyway, after our meeting, we gathered as a whole school and met. On our in-service day we also had the pleasure of grading persuasive writing assessments which was excellent practice! I'm thankful for all of my experiences student teaching thus far.

While interviewing on Monday, the principal was looking at my resume, and I was glancing at it and -- wow! It's amazing to think of all the things that have been accomplished within my four years of college. My Co-op experiences, work history/teaching experiences made my resume look great, and the principal was pleased with it, too. On the bright side, there are many exciting things coming up! I will finally be able to start my Urban Legends paper/project lesson when we return back from our break and I am so excited to finally get started on it. My freshmen are almost done reading Animal Farm and will be reviewing and testing on it when we return. My AVID students are also doing a research project, and we will begin reviewing Outlines, etc. soon. It feels good to know that I get the opportunity to do what I love everyday for the rest of my life. I have surely learned that teaching is difficult, and I know there will be many more obstacles to come my way, but I am flexible and willing to do what is necessary for the sake of my students.

As I stay snowed in tomorrow, I plan on getting a lovely head start on my KPTP, and adjusting my lesson plans for the week to come. I hope to finally finish The Hobbit which has been an excellent leisure read, and study more for an upcoming test. In between all of my proactive behaviors, I would love to take a nice, long cat-nap. I hope you all enjoy your snowed in days.

Live long and prosper, folks!
Ms. Aden

Life in a Donut Shop...

Donuts are wonderful - they're like teaching. We teach our students to be well "rounded", and we pray they're always sweet; however, running the donut shop can be a difficult process.

 "The art of teaching involves more than just following the curriculum and producing the results. Teaching is a craft the requires the craft [of] a donut shop, we must be able to set up shop in any location and practice our art. Our ability to influence a student doesn't come off a shelf, sold by the dozen, but it comes in our ability to show each person that we care enough about them to understand their individual needs. Teachers are individuals with varied strengths and weaknesses, and part of our art is learning to shine through our strengths without letting the weakness bring us down." - Teaching Underground

Interested in learning more about teaching and donut shops? Visit this website:
Teaching and Donuts: A Sweet Lesson for Our Craft

Well, this week was definitely interesting. I took over our AVID class, and introduced them to a research project over four modern issues (juvenile crime, discrimination, race relations, and poverty). The students have been given one of the four topics, and now they're free to go whichever way they want with the topic. Some are having extreme difficulty with this freedom; however, I reminded them when they get into college their paper topics may not be clear cut. As for my darling freshmen class, we began reading the beloved book, Animal Farm. I have really enjoyed teaching both classes, the freshmen are still "fresh" in the sense that some are eager to learn and help the teacher when possible. Thank goodness for this!

This past week was definitely not perfect, I was called a name that was used in a derogatory manner, but the situation allowed me to assert and show my role as an authority to my students. As a teacher, I learned that I have to take every predicament at face value. There's always a reason for everything, and this situation, though disheartening (and it made my blood boil just a little bit) taught me that I can't take everything personally. Plus, my day was going fantastic before this situation occurred. It was like almost completing a the last rep of a bench press, and then someone comes screaming in my face calling me nasty names, and I just wanted to toss the bar and give up. However, I just keep on keeping on for the sake of my sanity and for the sake of the learning environment and my students. I will say though, after a rough day there are some wonderful ideas to vent - for instance, work out. There is nothing better than taking frustrations from the day out on the treadmill, or the weight machine while listening to Florence + The Machine belt out a melody that makes your heart explode with the release of anxiety, stress, and frustration. Although, I'm sure I looked like Homer in this picture (above), I felt great afterwards! (But awfully sore the next day.) I guess my advice to you is to find something to help release the worries and anxieties that the day brings.

Also, listen to some Flo, talk about some serious pipes! Shake it Out!

Have an excellent week my friends! Good luck on your interviews tomorrow at the interview day and as always,

Live long and prosper, folks!
Ms. Aden

An Educator's Dedication to J.R.R. Tolkien

An Educator's Dedication to J.R.R. Tolkien
Amber Aden

I am the wizard with my internal hat and staff of knowledge,
guiding and leading the dwarves and hobbits
through Middle Earth.
At times I stand aside and let
my youngers find their own way -
I carry the staff, the light
of knowledge and wisdom, safety
and security.
My youngers doubt me in times of trials,
but the teacher is always silent during the test.
With my internal hat and staff I fight, lead, and guide,
I fend off danger to protect my youngers
on their life journeys; finding their home,
creating a better world for themselves
and those around them.
I support and encourage them through the adversities.

I fight so hard to the bitter end
to be renewed - born again
into the confident white wizard.
My dwarves and hobbits get into problems
beyond my control --
that's when my elves and eagles come,
assist, and be my heroes.

I am not an invincible white wizard,
I am constantly growing and changing.
My dwarves, hobbits, elves, eagles and fellow wizards
mold me
into the white wizard I am supposed to be.

Live long and prosper, folks.